Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Do you remember when music had balls?

So yea, I really dig industrial music. Basically most of my favorite bands are either old school punk or obscure industrial/hardcore/metal/techno/electronica. In the current era of indie flippery, I can't help but think that kids have overall grown into incredible pussies. Not to say that the sensitive type is bad or anything, but frankly sometimes you just need to let people know you aren't going to take their fucking bullshit. So we've got this whole sensitive guy thing going on these days. Tons of these guys go out trying to seem cultured and appeal to a variety of rarified tastes. Now I'm sure that plenty of these guys could probably talk my ear off about the intricacies of indie music. But how many of them are actually TRYING TO PLAY MUSIC? Not many. Sorry to break it to you kids, but there's a reason that your favorite bands have never been heard of outside the state you live in. It's not because they are "elite". It's because in most circumstances they just aren't very good to listen to. Music is supposed to move you. It's not just something you wield as a status symbol, it's something that evokes a feeling inside of you. Makes you move. Makes you feel something. And in the case of most music I like, makes you remember that you really don't have to take shit from other people.

Music in the current era has largely forgotten how to do this. Those of you over the age of 20, do you remember when music had some fucking balls? Like when you listened to a band and other people actually got the fuck out of your way because they were like "Holy shit! That guy is fucking dangerous. Don't piss him off!" No, I don't mean the wierd street variety of goth and punk that were at best a sideshow attraction asking you for change on your daily stroll through town. I mean the type of motherfucker who looked like he was going to break you in half if you pissed him off, and managed to do so without acting like a chump or posturing and putting up some silly front to try and make people believe he was a badass. He just was. These guys are the ones who go to shows where you were lucky to leave without being bloody. They were badass because frankly if they weren't, they stopped going to shows and picked another scene. This existed to some degree in a wide variety of scenes; from metal to punk to hardcore to rap to industrial, and even techno and electronica. All of these things eventually got watered down as they were integrated into mainstream pop music, and were eventually replaced with something a little more raw. But it seems like somewhere along the line raw was replaced with obscure. It's not about the raw passion anymore, it's about being into something that lets you stump your peers with your rarified musical interests.

I distinctly remember this era. And frankly I find it preferable to acting like I'm into bands that sound like shit or that I have a vagina for the sole sake of trying to identify with females. I do not have a vagina. Well, not one that's attached to me anyways; I have one that sleeps next to me every night. And that vagina likes me just fine without me trying to be all weepy and teary eyed just so we have something in common. I also do not need to try and look like I know a ton of shit that nobody else knows about to impress that vagina either. I am good at a handful of things, and I DO those things instead of talking about things that I want to be good at, but am not. That's what impresses that vagina. And that vagina is pretty fucking impressed. Impressed enough that it always comes back no matter how bad I fuck up. And that is really a big part of what being a man is. Not to try and understand every little intricacy of something, but to just DO something. Get the fuck off of your ass and do it. Stop fucking talking about it and go do it.

There are an awful lot of young frustrated men out there who seem to have forgotten what manhood actually is. We are the ones who get shit done. We are the ones who make the money, stand up to bullshit, and tell others who fuck with us to go fuck off or eat their teeth. When people piss and moan about the way we are we tell them to get fucked. We don't go around starting shit for no reason, because that's not a man, that's an asshole. But we do stand up to whatever shit comes our way. These, incidentally are the men that are actually getting laid. Frequently.

You don't have to be a jackass to everyone, just the people who push you around. Push back harder. Realistically you don't need to make someone think you can kick their ass to make them back down. You only need to make them understand that whether you win or lose you are going to do so much fucking damage to them that their life will never again be as easy as it was the day before they fought you. Self preservation does the rest for you. In an effort to remind you to let your fucking balls drop, I hereby give you this musical example:

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Marvel vs. Capcom 3. Looks effing sweet. I used to play the everlovingfuck out of MvC 1&2. I am wondering how in the hell Ryu is going to stand up to Wolverine. Ok, he can throw fire and do a pretty sweet uppercut, but really. Fucker is not even close to indestructible. I know it's balanced for gameplay purposes for seriously. Also why is that retard from Resident Evil in it? All he can do is run out of ammo and limp. He can't even walk and shoot at the same time. 

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Jiggery Doo is here for you!

Hello fellow internet friends. I would like to take a moment to introduce you to my web space. Normally I would tell you why you are here at this point, but it is clear that you are here because you clicked a link from somewhere. I do not need to inform you of the manner in which you have clicked your mouse because that would reek or redundancy. In any event, I have decided to become yet another blogger wasting countless hours prattling on about nothing in particular and will be honored if you would join me in my quest to waste as much time as possible on no particularly relevant or useful endeavors. Thank you for your patronage.